When Vampire's get drunk
by lozzie15
Summary: Renfield spike's Vlad's drink with pretty strong alcohol...Vlad gets VERY drunk, Bertrand, Erin and Ingrid also get drunk, and boyband, The Wanted are vampires? Vlad can sing Adele? Vampire's can vomit? please read and review.
1. Chapter 1

When Vampire's get drunk

Have any of you guys, ever wondered, What vampire's are like, when they are pissed?

Summery: Renfield has had enough of Vlad, He never liked Vlad as a kid, and he just can't stand him as a teenager, So he decides to teach the young chosen one a lesson, He spikes Vlad's blood substitute, with addictive alcohol, Which makes you want more and more.

Too bad Erin, Bertrand and Ingrid have a sip...

Oh, And did i mention the boyband, ''The Wanted'' are going to be in this story too?

Chapter One

Renfield muttered and grumbled, putting together his ''Masters'' dinner, which consisted of blood soaked meat, with the finest Transylvanian spices, and wine in a meaty sauce.

He didn't know why he even bothered, When he presented the vampires, with their food, Vlad looked like he was about to sick every single dinner time, Then grabbed a pot noodle, which he had been told specifically not to eat. Erin just stared at her food, like it might bite her, and Bertrand, Wolfie and The Count pigged out.

Renfield really hated Vlad, Ever since he was a little kid, Renfield wanted revenge, His eyes skimmed over the various bottles and concoctions of different drinks and mixtures.

His eyes set on a bottle of alcohol, The Count had confiscated if of Ingrid years ago, Before she had became a vampire.

Renfield picked up the bottle, Then he grabbed a couple of glasses, pouring the thick black liquid into them. Then he grinned.

''Cheer's, Master Vlad'' He said, Then he set out to give the ''Coke'' to Vlad.

Vlad's POV

''Well, This is fun..'' I muttered to myself. I was stretched out on my bedroom floor, My school workbooks spread in front of me, Erin was stretched out next to me, She was completely embroiled in stupid book she was reading, I only agreed to do this ''Study date'' with her, because i wanted to talk to her, and maybe kiss her...a lot.

I smiled to myself. Erin looked so cute when she was concentrating. I sighed, then got back to Algebra. Fun.

''Ohh, Could do with a drink'' Erin said, Then she stretched like a cat, Then turned and smiled at me. My heart melted. If i had one.

Renfield then came bustling through my bedroom door's, He held two bottle's of coke in his huge hands. I frowned, ''I thought dad banned coke'' I said.

Renfield smiled, his usual sickly grin. ''Human drinks, Master Vlad...Do you not want a HUMAN drink?'' He emphasised the word ''Human'' i gave up being curious, Then rushed to Renfield, took the drinks of him, Then smiled politely and told him to go.

I screwed the cap of the bottle, Then drank deep. The taste was over whelming. I hadn't had this drink in four years, It tasted so good, But a little bit different, a bit tangy.

I smiled, Then wiped my mouth, ''That's good stuff'' i exclaimed a bit wildly, Then i found myself throwing my arms up in the air, like a kid.

Erin had took a long sip too, When she stopped drinking, She started swaying, Straight into me.

Then, i found myself wanting more coke, it tastes so good, and i wanted more. So much more.

Erin tossed me my bottle, then she took another full on swig of coke, then burped and laughed, swaying from side to side.

I began to feel funny, a bit lightheaded and strange...But i liked it. I found myself drinking more and more, until i could barely stand up. Me and Erin started to talk gibberish, laughing for no reason. Then taking more and more swig's of the ''Coke''

''Oh my god, The worlds spinning round!'' Erin squealed in a high pitched voice, inside, my head was going mental, and my body was telling m to keep calm, and work whatever had made me go a little bit crazy, But i don't want this feeling to end. I want to be...drunk, like a normal teenage boy...and drunk, i shaal get!

Ingrid's POV

I awoke to high pitched laughing, and squealing. I arose in my coffin, ''Who dare's awake the princess of darkness!'' I screamed.

Wolfie came into my room, ''Ingrid, There's something wrong with Vlad and Erin, Their acting a bit weird..you know, They are like all over each other, and moaning...and groaning...and I'm pretty sure Vlad screamed at one point-''

I got out of my coffin, as quick as possible, Then i raced over to Vlad's room with vampire speed, i paused at the door. Dare i go in? Or will i be scarred for life?

''Vlad, Its Ingrid, Is it safe to come in?'' I shouted.

There were giggles, From the other side of the door, Then Erin shouted, or I think she slurred something which didn't make sense.

That's it. I walked into Vlad's room, to see Vlad and Erin sat on the floor, cross legged like little kid's.

''Shriii shwrgrid'' Vlad slurred, Oh my god. He was pissed, my little seventeen year old brothr was pissed..on..Coke?

''You really can'y handle your drinks, Can you Vlad?'' I asked my brother, who just sat there, staring at me, his eyes were huge, and a very vacant expression on his face.

Then he stood up, Then swayed and sat down laughing. I walk over to Vlad, attempting to get him away from whatever he was drinking, When Erin tossed me a bottle.

Coke. I haven't had this since i was eight years old, Dad banning it, because it was too ''Human''

I sat down next to my brother, Who was humming to himself, Erin was laughing and giggling, and making stupid noises.

''Maybe just a little sip'' I murmured. Then I screwed the cap off the bottle, Then drank deep gulps of the coke.

Wait, That is not coke. Its something else...

But before i could realise, i was drinking mixed vodka, my mind became numbed, and i felt lightheaded and strange.

Vlad and Erin are hand in hand now, singing a song, which i have no idea what it is, because i can't even understand the words, which fly out of their mouths, Never mind the song they are singing.

''Woahh, Dadddss, Gooonnnaa, Goooo..crackrers!'' Vlad managed to shout, then he stood up, swaying.

''Iiiingrriid, Wheeeenn. Diddd, You-Get..here?'' Vlad asked me, he looked generally confused, and looked like he as coming out of the bubble, the alcohol had him under.

I suddenly realise, I can't reply. My mouth is numb, and all I can think about is that cool, refreshing drink running down my throat.

''Waiiiiit, Whaaatttss..Gooooinnngg onnnnn?'' Vlad slurred, His capability of speech, slowly coming back.

I still can't reply, The world is spinning around, i smile widely at Vlad, Who is looking more confused then ever, and enter my own little world...

Vlad's POV

Whoa, Oh god my head is killing me. What the heck happened? How did Ingrid get here?

''Ingrid, How did you get here?'' I attempt to say, But all that comes out of my mouth, is twisted vocabulary, and the occasional sound.

The room is flashing, Erin looks totally out of it, Ingrid look's like she's dancing, and Bertrand is...

Wait, Bertrand!

''Bertrand, I can explain!'' I try to shout at my tutor, but all what comes out of my mouth is, ''Barnum, shim...plain''

''Vlad, i can't understand a word your saying!'' Bertrand yelled, over Erin's singing, and Ingrid's yells, for random crap.

''I said, I can explain!'' I shout, but again, I slurr things, which even i cant make out.

I stand there, swaying like an idiot, When suddenly, Erin pop's into view, She's grinning, and holding a bottle of whatever I drank.

''Vladdy, geeet, This, down..your shummf!'' She slurred, then she threw up all over me, and started dancing like a lunatic.

Thank god the drink is waring off, i am NEVER drinking again.

I attempted to wipe vomit of my shirt, When i was rugby tackled from behind, I landed on the floor with a, ''Ooof!'' And I'm pretty sure, I empted the contents of my stomach while I was at it.

My head spun, I turned to see Bertrand was straddling me, his eyes had gone a strange translucent, and his expression was vacant.

''Have a bit of this, Its brilliant!'' Bertrand slurred, Then he forced the drink into my mouth, and i could do nothing, but drink deep, unless i wanted my legs broken.

Oh god, i can feel it again, My mind is closing down, and i feel on tingly, i find myself grinning like an idiot, Then i joined in a routine of throwing up, and dancing with Erin and Ingrid, While Bertrand, stole Erin's ''The Wanted'' album, Then blasted it out, singing out very loud to it, and slurring the chorus.

I feel great though, i join hands with Erin, and we sing and dance to the songs Bertrand is playing, and i vomit on her face, and she laugh's and vomit's on mine.

LIFE IS GREAT!

The Count's POV

''IM GLAD YOU CAME, THE SIUN GOES DOWN, THE STAR'S COME OUT MY UNIVERSE IS HERE TONIGHT, I'LL NEVER ME THE SAME, IM GLAD YOUUU CAME!''

I shot up in my coffin, to hear music? I then realised that i couldn't just hear music, i could hear..Vlad...and that half fang..and Ingrid singing?

Wait, Bertrand too?

Renfield came running in, ''Master, Come quick, Vlad and the other's are...well i can't think of what to call it..''

I followed Renfield up to Vlad's room, Where the blasting music was coming through, Don't get me wrong, I like The wanted...and one day i shall invite them here, and drain them..I bet they taste lovely. But for now, I happened to find Erin's new album in her draw, and i couldn't resist. I also ''Borrowed'' Vlad's iPod, and downloaded the entire album on to it, I think I'm addicted...

I burst through Vlad's bedroom door, to me greeted to the smell of sick, and drink...and more sick.

''Daddy!'' Vlad yelled, My SEVENTEEN year old vampire son, ran over to me and game me a huge hug.

''Whinge crasshhh thermo partita!'' Vlad slurred, then threw up all over my new shoes, he then giggled and started to do pelvic thrusts to whatever song was playing..Ah yes, Heart Vacancy..I do love that song..

''Vladimir, What on earth do you think your doing!'' I bellowed at my son, who giggled like a little kid, Then set fire to his lamp.

''Getting pissed, What does it look like father!'' He replied, and i stood back in shock, How dare he speak to me like that!

My eyes rested on Bertrand, who had somehow managed to catch a bird, and was ''Riding'' it, also chewing on its neck.

Ingrid, and the half fang, Erin, were dancing like little girls, occasionally throwing up in each other, calling each other ''Bumder's'' and then laughing, and carried on dancing!

Vlad gave ma a lopsided grin, Then grinned at me, ''I got you what you always dreamed of!'' He squealed, Then opened up his closet, to reveal The Wanted band, looking extremely scared and confused.

''This isn't radio one's studio'' The youngest muttered.

''Chill guys, Its like a...Fancy dress party'' The tallest said.

I swear, i nearly had a human fan girl moment, i rushed over to them, introduced myself, And then went a bit mad, and bit them all.

''Yay!'' Vlad said childishly, Then he slipped on something on the floor, Then went flying into the wall laughing like a hyena.

''Weeeeeeeee!'' Vlad sang, then hit the wall face first, but was still laughing.

''I like lettuce!'' Erin announced proudly, Then she did a little dance, and went flying straight into Vlad, who was doing a very twisted version on the hokey cokey.

The Wanted's blood wasn't as nice as i expected, and i had killed them, they were my favourite band, except ''I want your Blood'' who i was obsessed with, when i was a teen back in Transylvania.

I look at the scene in front of me, Carlisle, One of my oldest vampire friends was coming for a hunt in a few hours, how would he react if he found my drunk out of his head son, Who was also the Chosen one, four dead celebrities in the closet, and a bird with teeth marks in its neck?

What else could possibly go wrong?

''I believe i can flyyyyy!'' Vlad shouted, I turned in horror to see he was on the window pane, grinning like a idiot, he still haven't mastered his full vampire power's, including flying.

Then my phone rang, Yes don't sound so surprised, i have a phone, i answered it, keeping aware of my son's possible attempted suicide.

''Jump, JUMP, JUMP!'' Erin, Ingrid, and Bertrand were yelling.

''Hello?'' I murmured.

''Count Dracula, Its Malaya Dennison, from the vampire council, I'm just ringing up to say, I'll be popping round to see your son Vladimir, the chosen one, just for a chat''

''Its really not the best time..-'' I yelled down the phone, over Vlad's awful singing attempt of Adele's ''Someone like you''

''NEVER MIND I'LL FIND...SOMEONE LIKE YOUUUUUU!'' Vlad sang/slurred, very off key.

''I have to go'' I shouted down the phone, Then i threw my phone to Renfield, who caught it.

I ran over to Vlad, and grabbed him, he started yelling and screaming like a little boy, ''Father, leeett me goo!'' He yelled.

Then there was a knock on the door. Oh my god, Malaya, She was early..

Vlad, using his vampire strength, ripped himself out of my arm's, Then staggered out of the room, followed by his drunk posse.

''Wee are the besssstt so screw the rest!'' Ingrid sang, off key, while following Vlad, Wherever he was going.

''Wee doo what we damn well please!'' Erin sang along, Then both girls screeched, ''Girls rule boys drool!''

''Oh yeah?'' Vlad slurred, Then he fell backwards into a bookcase.

''Yeah!'' Erin and Ingrid, Slurred/Screamed.

Suddenly, i could hear vicious banging from the closet in Vlad's room, I opened it to reveal, The Wanted...Vampires.

Please review

Lauren xxx

Ohhhhh The wanted are vampires! :D

Vlad likes Adele! :O XD

Ingrid and Erin can sing! :D

The Count loves The wanted? :O

If you want more, Please review


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The Count's POV

A couple of things were running through my head, as I stared at my favourite boy band- turned evil vampires. One, my son is extremely wacked up on whatever he and his idiot sister, and half fang friend had drunk, Two, I'm going to rip Bertrand's eye's out of his socket's when he becomes sober, Three, How was I going to explain all this to Malaya?; Four, I have absolutely no idea, how I'm going to explain to all The boy's fan's, That I killed them (accidently) and sort of...turned them into evil creatures of the night...Never mind vampires, those fan girls are going to tear me apart.

But, To my surprise, all I managed to utter, When I found my voice, was, ''Can you still sing?''

The youngest of the boy band, looked as if he was about to tear my head off, Newborn vampire's were like that...I think.

''I'm thirsty'' the curly haired one said, Then he snarled at me, ''Get me some blood, or I'll rip your arm off'' He said coldly.

This is not the Jay, I remembered, Yes, I knew there names..i suppose you can call me a fangirl then...Go ahead, See if you can make it out f here alive...

To be perfectly honest, I was scared of them, Vlad scared me when he became a vampire, and I'm pretty sure celebrities were the same...

''Erin!'' I shouted.

Erin burst into through the door, She was singing, and staggering, Vlad was on her shoulder's. She was giving him a piggyback.

''Yor, Whatsit County babes!'' Erin exclaimed, Then she saw who were on the floor, Then screamed the house down, then started yelling gibberish, and slurring things which made no sense at all.

Vlad just staggered into things, grinning, Mr Cuddles was wrapped round his neck.

''Its...its...its...One Direction!'' Erin squealed/slurred, then paraded round the room, singing, ''We are the champions!''

''What, Erin...That's The Wanted!'' I shouted, Then i realised Erin and Vlad were drunk, They had no idea what they were doing, or what they were seeing, I could put the sugar babes right in front of Vlad, and he would just stand there, grinning like an idiot. Not realising who they were.

''A breather'' The youngest of the boys managed to utter.

Suddenly, Nathan (My favourite band member) rushed over to Erin in vampire speed, he grabbed her by the neck and she giggled, Then he attempted to bite her, But she kept laughing, and stroking his nose.

''She's a half fang, Not a breather!'' I yelled.

Nathan's eyes turned Red, then he snarled at Erin.

''Touchy touchy!'' She squealed.

''Oi, That's my half fang"!'' Vlad snarled/snarled, Nathan seemed to want to fight, Then walked over to Vlad, his eyes Red, ''Bring it on, freak'' Nathan said.

Vlad flashed his fangs, Then stumbles backwards into the door, ''Bring it on...JLS...member of JLS... erm...pop star guy

''Err, Vlad's a bit..you know...drunk at the moment'' I cut in, Vlad's snarl turned into a grin.

''I'm off to get layed'' He slurred, Then he rushed off in vampire speed.

I looked at the newly turned vampire's, Oh god, Why did I bite them? I should of let them go, They can't sing, with chunks missing from their throat!

''I can actually'' Said Nathan, then he stood up, and sang the chorus to ''Glad you came''

I stared at him, ''Oh'' I said simply.

''One Direction, I've always wanted to meet you!'' Erin burbled, Then she started screaming like a fan girl, Then she started doing a mad tap dance, ending with her toppling over, straight into the door.

''For the tenth time, We're not One Direction!'' Tom bellowed, Then he sniffed, ''Oh, That smell's good..'' he murmured.

Erin grinned, Then she staggered over to me, ''hey, County babes!'' She squealed, Then she grabbed my ear playfully.

''Erin, How much do you and my...son drink?'' I asked her.

''Umm.. like...ten or maybe twenty bottles'' Erin slurred, then she threw up all over me.

Erin hiccupped, then giggled. ''Sorry'' She said, Then she stumbled backwards into Nathan, grabbed him, then gave him a huge smooch on the lips, Then she threw up on his face.

''Hehe, Sorry!'' Erin said, then she collapsed, and i think she's out cold.

Nathan wiped vomit of his face, Then looked down at Erin, His eyes turned Red, then he lunged for her throat.

''No!'' Another Wanted member, Jay shouted, then he tackled Nathan to the ground, then snarled at his band mate.

''Get your own blood!'' Jay yelled, Then threw himself at Erin, who was screaming and laughing, and the same time, while loudly singing, ''Moves like jagga''

This is a nightmare, I have to stop this, Malaya will be arriving soon to see Vlad, How will she react when she seen all this!

Vlad then stumbled in, carrying yet another bottle of ''Coke'' he was grinning, and he was holding hands with two more people.

''Breather's'' I muttered, then i side glanced at Nathan, Who was straddling Erin, Erin was laughing, and yelling ''Ride me, buckaroo!''

''He's trying to kill you, Cant you see that!'' I hissed at Erin. She just smiled dreamily, ''Yes, Oh god..kill me any day..guy off one direction!'' She squealed, Then started giggling hysterically.

''I'm not from One Direction!'' Nathan snarled, then got ready to bite Erin's throat.

''Guys, Look what I've got!'' Jay yelled, He had disappeared, and had came back with four breather's who were struggling..they looked familiar..

''Daddy, Robin and Chloe ha**ve **joined the parttttaaaayy!'' Vlad yelled, then Robin and Chloe came in, just as startling drunk as Vlad and his posse.

Nathan got of Erin, then went off to feast on a couple of random breathers-

Wait a sec!

Oh my god, Their going to kill the people who present The One show!

As quickly as possible, i went over in vampire speed, snatched the guys who presented The One show, Then chucked them to Renfield. ''Just get them out of my- and there sight!'' I shouted, Then i snarled at the blood thirsty vampire's in front of me.

''We're hungry!'' Nathan moaned, Then joined his animalistic band, who were crouched like tiger's, watching Vlad's friends, who he had somehow managed to pick up, Robin and Chloe, with Vlad, they were staring at the boy band, as if they couldn't believe what they were seeing.

''Its..Oh my god..its the black eye'd peas!'' Chloe screeched, then she downed the glass in her hand, then ran round in a circle squealing words i couldn't understand, most of them were human rude language.

''Its not The black eye'd pea's, its Ndubz!'' Robin shot back, then he took a huge gulp of whatever was in his glass.

''We're THE WANTED, Okay...THE WANTED!'' Max yelled, then decided to bite his own arm, I guess he was that hungry, he had decided to morbidly eat himself.

Vlad sniggered, then stumbled into Robin and Chloe, ''Yourrrrr all wrong..Its Jedward..OBVIOUSLY!'' He slurred.

The Wanted band, all cried out in annoyance and anger.

Then Wolfie came in, ''What's going on Uncle Count?'' He mumbled sleepily, he was clutching his teddy bear.

Everyone turned to him, Vlad vomited all over the place, breaking the silence.

Then Wolfie looked at The Wanted, who were practically drooling at him, ''Hey look, its Maroon five!'' Wolfie shouted in glee.

Nathan and his band face palmed, They weren't the only ones.

...

Please review for more craziness! XD

If u want any celeb's in this fic... Just review with the name, and ill pop them in


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